Grateful

There are literally millions of people in this world who are suffering for different reasons like Hunger, War, Poverty, or Natural Calamities.

And because of that I'm very grateful for the things that I possessed as of the moment.

Five. Great Job that I enjoy a lot.

Four. Nice House

Three. Very few people that I consider as close friends.

Two. Good Health & not just me but my whole family.

One. I know that God is on my side.

I have always been the guy that can find joy in the simplest things & to have all 5 is more than I could ever ask for.

Counting our blessings is something that all of us should learn to do on a daily basis because even if we think we are having a hard life at this point in time, there are still a lot of people living on different parts of this world whose suffering is far greater than ours.

Do some reflecting today & think of things that you are grateful for.

Looking Back

They say that you need to live your life to the fullest since you will only live once & I couldn't agree more. 

But that doesn't mean that we need to try everything including the things that we know are bad for us. 

There should always be a limitation on what we can & can't do do dahil sabi nga nila lahat ng sobra masama.

I need to remind myself that... ALWAYS.

Because I don't want to look back on my life & have regrets on the things that I wasn't able to accomplish but COULD HAVE if I only took the chance.

Force Field

Relationship has always been tricky for me.

It takes a lot of time before I can open up to another person & once I do it scares me a lot.

Sabi nga kasi nila the only people that can hurt you are the ones that you love which I don't want to happened.

That's the reason why my defenses are always up, it's like having an impenetrable force field around me 24 hours a day.

But I'm working on it because I know that I can't shut myself in or shut other people out forever.

It wouldn't be right.

I'm not saying that I'll do a 360 degrees backflip & be friendly to everyone because that will never be my style.

All I'm saying is that NO MAN SHOULD EVER BE AN ISLAND & that includes me.

10 Facts about Me

Ten. Can't live without my phone.

Nine. Swimming is my favorite sport.

Eight. I like eating alone.

Seven. I hate people who are lazy, liars, & freeloaders.

Six. I drink 4 cups of coffee everyday.

Five. I don't smoke.

Four. I have a high tolerance for alcohol even though I only drink once a month.

Three. Never cheated in my life.

Two. I stopped one semester in College because I was brokenhearted.

One. My earliest sexual experience was when I was in grade school.

Oil & Water

Keisha: You're a bit old fashioned for my taste but I like you Gian.

Me: (silent then smiled) I just broke up with my ex girlfriend last December Keisha.

Keisha: So? Your not together anymore right? Unless you're still in love with her.

Me: No I'm not. I was actually the one who called it quits.

Keisha: Then there's no problem...

Me: (silent then smiled)

That's one of the many conversations that we had during our date last night. I guess she's kinda right that there's no reason for us not to be together or at least spend some time with each other.

It's just that I find the two of us too different which is probably a good thing depending on how I look at it. 

Anyway, I won't be making any decision yet since I have to know her better first before doing anything.

If we're meant to be together then it will happened eventually.

Facebook

I don't have a Facebook account, shocking right? Hehehe

Whenever people that I know asked me that question, I'm always amused with the reaction that I get after answering them :)

Is it too hard to believe that not everyone is into Facebook? I don't think so. 

I would rather surf websites, play online games, or watch a movie or series online than do the FB. 

I just find it too time consuming lang but then again to each his own naman :) so one can do whatever he pleases.

Anxious

I have been anxious ever since I woke up because of my date tonight with a girl in the office. I already mentioned her In my previous post, her name is Keisha. She is very pretty & known for being a little high maintenance (at least that's what I heard).

I've dated a few girls like that in the past & sure I had fun going out with them but it didn't last so I'm wondering if this is even worth pursuing.

On the other hand what if she's the one that I'm waiting for? Should I just give up without trying first? HELL NO!

TGIS

I can't tell you how much thankful I am that it's already the weekend. As I have mentioned in my previous post I was really busy with work this past week. I really wanted to go out of town but 2 days is too short so alam ko mabibitin lang ako.

I'm planning to watch 2 movies, dine out, get a massage, swim, & play badminton in my rest days plus go on a date tonight which is more of a friendly date (I think). 

She's someone that I know from work. We sometimes bump into each other since we're on the same floor but from different teams. I still don't know if it will work out or if I really like her. You may wonder why I asked her out if I'm not sure & the answer to that is I didn't, she was the one who invited me.

I was in the pantry drinking coffee alone yesterday when she came up to me. We chatted for 15 minutes & before she left she dropped a bomb on me :) 

"Obviously you're a bit torpe so I'll make this easier for you. Let's meet up at Starbucks in The Podium tomorrow night at 7pm."

I was paralyzed for 10 minutes after that.

Sleep Deprived

My schedule for this week has been so crazy. For instance yesterday my shift was 7am until 4pm but then I had to go back to work by 12 midnight (Thursday) for the start of another shift because of the things that I need to accomplish.

There were a couple of special tasks that were assigned to me which I'll be doing for a few weeks. I have to be on the graveyard shift twice a week since I'll be talking to the Quality Team leaders in the U.S. about the new program that we will be implementing this coming February. Naturally I have to follow their schedules & timezones. 

Although I've been losing sleep I'm actually not complaining :) because I find my work enjoyable, stimulating, & satisfying which is why I feel so blessed to have it. 

Pag wala nga ako sa office when it's either my rest day or I'm on leave it seems that I easily get bored kasi ang bagal ng oras hehehe. I think that's normal for me dahil gusto ko lang I'm always doing something or preoccupied with whatever stuff para I won't do anything stupid :)

Dad

My Father & I have never been close not one bit. Ever since I was a kid I've always known that Jay is his favorite & I am at peace with that. I used to hate him for years from grade school until high school because he seems so much harder on me than on my younger brother but not anymore.

Jay is more like my Dad. He is good in business & very extrovert. I on the other hand prefers to work in a job that I enjoy & quite the introvert.

According to about.com "basically, an extrovert is a person who is energized by being around other people. This is the opposite of an introvert who is energized by being alone". That sounds exactly like Jay & me.

My Father actually taught me a very valuable lesson because of the way he treated me while I was growing up which is to be independent & not ask for help from anyone. 

I will always be thankful for that even though I know that it was something that he didn't mean to pass on to me.

Now I can say that our relationship is far better compared to before. You know why? It's because I have already forgiven him for the things that he did in the past & accepted the fact that I could never please him like Jay can.

Fitness

Since today is rest day, I decided to work out... but I never left the pad. You see I have my own personal gym in my place. I have a treadmill, ab rocket, & a couple of dumbbells.

I used to be a member of fitness first before about 2 years ago but then I stopped. I just thought that it will save me more money in the long run if I invested on gym equipments rather than paying for the monthly membership at Fitness First & I was totally right. I couldn't have been more happier with the decision that I made.

It was quite cheap & didn't cost me more than 4 thousand pesos... since my Dad purchased my first ever treadmill for me (so thanks Dad!).

 

I ran for about 2 hours, use my dumbbells for an hour, & the ab rocket for 30 minutes. Now I feel lighter & wonderful since I was able to perspire a lot & released some of the toxins in my body.

I try to do it everyday but my schedule doesnt permit it so as long as I can work out 3 times a week then I'm happy. It's important for me to be healthy & fit at all times because I only have one body so why not take care of it?

No Regrets

Ahhhhh I have a freaking headache today!

I went home around 5am this morning & woke up with a serious case of hang over. This is the part that I hate whenever I drink alcohol which is exactly the reason why I try to avoid it if I can.

Good thing I enjoyed myself last night otherwise I would have regretted going out :)

Coal

I had a blast last night...

My work friends & I went to Coal Bar in Harbor Square which is across the famous CCP Complex. It was my first time to go & I had so much fun.

Being a Saturday night the place was really crowded, good thing we spotted a group of people leaving early as we entered the establishment. Actually it's more of a luck since no one leaves a bar at 10pm. Anyway, the place wasn't impressive & so is the food but since I'm in the company of good friends plus I met a couple of very interesting individuals (o sige na nga isa lng hehehe) I was able to enjoy every minute of it.

There were 5 of us 3 guys & 2 girls but as the night progresses our group became bigger. It all started when I met this girl who's just 2 feet away from me, her name is Lindsey. We were sitting side by side when we sort of looked at each other at the same time then smiled. Before I realized we were already having a casual conversation & getting to know each other.

Naturally I introduced her to my friends while Lindsey introduced me to hers. Around 3 am we left Coal for Starbucks all 16 of us where we stayed for an hour and a half.  She & I were able to talk some more, this time it was more of a serious tone while the rest of the group were being childish & silly in a good way.

Before Lindsey & her friends left she gave me her mobile number then whispered to my ear "Dont forget to text me tomorrow Gian", I looked at her hazel colored eyes & nodded.

I texted her after lunch today :)

Freedom

Tomorrow is my last work day for the week so thank God! 

Even though I enjoy doing my job on a daily basis syempre I'm still looking forward to my rest days just to relax & have fun. 

This week has been so stressful to me & everyone in my team because aside from our goals & responsibilities that we have to do there has been a lot of drama going on. 

Ganun naman talaga yata kahit saan ka mapunta, there are people na di mo trip because of their attitude towards others. Bakit ba kasi kailangan pa na merong mga nilalang na tamad, mandaraya, at makapal ang mukha sa mundo eh pwede naman na wala.

I think this world will be better off without them.

Flattered

I was at Starbucks today ordering my favorite caramel frappe when I saw this girl checking me out. 

I know that she's looking at me because I already caught her twice. A colleague of mine also noticed her & told me "Dude, there's a cute girl at three o'clock"

She was smiling at me & so I did too as courtesy.

On my way out one of the baristas approached me & gave me a napkin with a note saying "Hi I'm Marian & this is my number 0917-824XXXX, please feel free to text me anytime".

That made my day complete.

Brotherly Love

Why is it when it comes to my only sibling in the world (let's call him J) I simply cant say no & whenever he has a problem why do I feel the need to step in each time? I guess that will always be my responsibility as the big brother & I'm not complaining because I WILL DO ANYTHING FOR HIM.

While we were on our way to work this morning, I noticed that he's not okay & that something was bothering him big time. He didn't tell me what it was but then my Dad did after my shift ended because he called me. 

You see aside from his job (he works in a Telecommunication company) he also has a side business which is buying & selling mobile phones. He only does it one at a time because he's afraid that not all the phones will be sold if he do it in bulk & then he will lose money. What he feared actually came true because someone from his office wanted a Nokia E72 so he bought one but then she backed out at the last minute (crazy bitch LOL). 

Syempre my brother was worried to death dahil for him mejo malaki money mawawala sa kanya kapag di nya nabenta yung phone. He maybe stronger than me physically but not intellectually or emotionally. Problems & stress easily gets to him so I have to intervene each time when I know he can't solve it on his own. 

Things work in the end because I had to make it work, ako na bumili nung phone nya :)

The good news is I've been planning to purchase a new one for quite sometime now since I had been using the same phone for 3 years already.

The bad news is it's not the phone that I want since I've been eyeing the BlackBerry Bold 9650 ever since I saw it a few weeks ago. Regardless of how much I'm drooling over it, I will never trade it for my brother's peace of mind & happiness.

Ako na ang mabait so dapat yata meron na rin ako rebulto sa Edsa ahahaha.

Old Letters

I was cleaning a bit earlier when I noticed a stack of envelopes in my desk that were addressed to me. I remembered putting it there last week while I was looking for my bank statement.

They were letters from my ex- girlfriends (& flings LOL) that I have kept dating back as far as the mid 1990's. I had 4 serious relationships which started when I was in my early teens.

After reading the letters (of my 1st girlfriend only & I don't know why hehehe), I cant help but wonder how different my life will be now if I agreed to marry her (let's call her L) when she first proposed to me years back. You see I was crazy in love with her for 5 years before she broke my heart. 

I first saw L when I was in Grade 6. It was the first day of school & as cliche as it may sound my world stopped upon seeing her walking down the hall. It's like there was a spot light hanging over her head & she was the only person that I was seeing at that time. 

I was truly mesmerized by her beauty & grace. It was the strangest feeling ever & up to now I still can't explain it.

Naturally I courted L & we were together for the most part of our highschool days.
She easily gets jealous which is so cute :) so there were cool off periods but not more than 3 days. We finally split up (not my decision) before going to College knowing how busy we (meaning she) will be.

One night out of the blue (about 2 years after we broke up) I received a call from her telling me how much she still loves me & wants us to get married right away. I gently turned her down because at that time we were still both in school, plus I already had a girlfriend while she's committed to someone else, & I wasn't sure anymore if I was still in love with her like she was to me.

About 5 years ago I found out that she got pregnant by her 2nd boyfriend (I was her first) & until now I still have a mixed feeling about it but definitely there were no regrets on my part over the decision that I made. 

I guess it just wasn't meant to be. 

As long as she's happy then I will be too for her.

Bored

After 3 hours of sleep, I feel a lot better now but still a bit woozy whenever I stand up & that's the good news. The bad news is that I'm bored which I think is worse than being sick :) I CAN'T just do NOTHING.

You see I love my work so much which I think is amazing in itself since not all can say the same thing when it comes to their respective jobs. I usually spend around 10-14 hours at work 5 times a week which is perfectly fine with me pero syempre pag weekends I make sure that I have fun para balance career & personal life. I go on a date, have drinking session with close friends (pag trip lang uminom), & spend time with my family.

Right now I'm in front of my PC typing this post which is a better alternative than watching movies online because it keeps my mind busy. This blog will serve another purpose aside from the reasons that I mentioned in my previous post, it will keep me preoccupied when I need to be.

Life is good again, LOL.

Sick

I woke up this morning shivering & with cold sweats all over my body. The minute that I opened my eyes I immediately know that I was sick. I also had this terrible headache & muscle pains, then I realized na meron ako trangkaso so badtrip talaga.

I think every 2 months palaging ganun, come to think of it that has always been my sickness for the past 5 years which I now consider as a blessing since I live on my own.

I had second thoughts if I can work today but there's a report that I had to finish. Sure someone can do it for me but I don't to be a burden because I know that he also has a lot of things to do as well.

Nag warm bath ako but that didn't help because it actually made my condition worse :) 

I arrived at work on time around pass 6 am (since my shift starts at 7) then I started working on report, I was able to finish it after 4 hours. After that may Superior saw how sick I was & instructed me to go home, ayoko pa nga sana but she asked me 3 times na umuwi na daw ako hehehe. Mejo workaholic kasi ako & she knows that very well kaya kahit may sakit I don't let it stop me from going to work. Kailangan nya pa ako kulitin para lang umuwi ahahaha & that's why I love her.

Pagdating sa pad inom agad ako medicine then went to bed after.

About Me

I've always been the silent type, I have this "I won't talk to you if you don't talk to me first" attitude & for that people thinks I'm suplado but in reality I'm really not.

I just enjoy being alone & I know how crazy that sounds but it's the plain truth. I only have a couple of people that I consider as true friends while the rest I regard them as acquaintances or work mates or church mates. I admit I have trust issues alam ko yon & that's because I know how painful it is to be betrayed by the same people that you love.

The good thing is I'm willing to change pero konti lang :) one person helped me realize that it's no good to keep everything to yourself. According to her It's not a good way to live (at least that's what she said)

This 2011 I will try my best to be more open to people & that's actually one of the reasons why I created this blog aside from being an outlet of my thoughts & a form to express myself.

I really hope she's right :)

New Beginning

I've tried blogging before but I stopped after writing the 1st article :) things got in the way plus life itself.

I've decided to come back & this time I'll make sure that I stay around.

As the new year starts & so is my blog, welcome guys!